4th of July – I just don’t get it

Okay, I mean, I get what the holiday is all about.  But for the life of me, I will NEVER understand why anyone would want to go out to the Esplanade in Boston for the festivities.  It’s crowded, you have to get there before the butt-crack of dawn in order to snag a good place to sit, and then you’re stuck there all day.  You have to take turns with anyone who is with you to get food and go to the bathroom (which consists of those nasty porta-potties), so maybe taking some diet pills ahead of time might not be such a bad idea. The you’d not be so hungry, which eliminates the need for at least some restroom trips.  You still gotta drink water or else you get dehydrated, though.

The going to the bathroom thing is a big issue with us.  When we go to ball games, I ALWAYS get seats on the aisle, so we can get to the bathroom without waiting for people to get up and move so that we can get by.  Me, I’m getting old and when I gotta go, I gotta go, and that’s that.  With Mike, he is on diuretics for a heart condition, and they like to say *hello* a lot.

So basically, we can’t go anywhere where there are not any easy to get to restrooms with little to no lines.

And getting home…FUHGEDDABOUT IT!  The MBTA has to be a nightmare!

I’ve never been to a 4th of July at the Esplanade.  But I have been to one, years ago, at the National Mall in Washington DC.  It was a crazy mob scene getting home.  I remember having to pee while waiting to get into a Metro station.  I had to pee so bad, it wasn’t funny.  There was a McDonalds outside the station, so I went in there to use the restroom.  In DC, usually they are strict about restrooms being for customers only, but the place was so packed, no one cared.  When I got into a stall, it was gross, the toilet was stopped up and all.  And there was no paper.  But I either had to pee there or in my pants, what else could I do?  It was disgusting, but any port in a storm.

The fireworks had ended at about 10:30 PM.  I did not get home until 3 AM.  Even during rush hour, this was normally no more than a 20-30 minute trip on the train and then the bus.

And that, my friends, is why we’ll NEVER do the Esplanade thing!

We’ll just be watching it on TV…coverage is local all day, but I think it goes national at 9 or 10 PM, with Craig Ferguson hosting.  Tune into your local CBS affiliate to see the show, and the mob scene I speak of here.

Hell, we get the best seats in the house, we can see and hear everything, we don’t have to deal with idiots invading our space, we can eat our own food, drink our own beer, and pee in our own bathroom whenever we want.  And no worrying about how long it will take to get home.  We get tired, we just go to sleep!

We’ll still get to see live fireworks, anyway…we’re going to the New Hampshire Fisher Cats game on Sunday night, and they are featuring one of their Atlas Fireworks spectaculars after the game.  This is a much better place to see fireworks, less mobbed, and they have lots of bathrooms!

However you celebrate the 4th, have fun and stay safe!